Understood? -Old

You'll never understand.

Starting this verse off with that line almost seems cliche but to dance around my feelings, I'll be damned. 

Everyday it's something new with you. 

I love you, then I hate you,

Then I hug you, then ten minutes later, again we argue. 

See I've never been the type to just let things happen. 

If things are gonna happen, then they're gonna happen my way & to my satisfaction. 

But I'm not selfish. 

I'll full heartedly give my heart, soul, time, energy, & tears to make sure my man is ok. 

I guess I get if from my mom because that trait I can easily portray. 

If I'm happy, I'll make you the happiest man you could ever dream of being.

But if I'm disappointed, I promise I'll leave you in pain as if you're heart was physically bleeding.

See you can't not give and expect 

& I don't mean money or material things, I mean respect. 

I deserve to be respected as if I sit on top of a throne for a living 

But right now I'm respected to the point where this relationship is just a misgiven. 

I'm a woman of many colors 

So don't you dare start to think that there can't ever be others. 

B. 

5 Gift Ideas For Him!

Wondering what to get your man for the holidays? Heres 5 great gift ideas he will love! 

1. My favorite gift to give my beloved is always a watch. A watch is one of the few pieces of jewelry a man actually wears so it always stands out. Whether he’s the flashy and stylish type or the laid back and casual type, you’ll be able to find a watch that fits his style without breaking the bank.

2. This next gift, is the gift that will keep on giving even when you rather it not lol. If your man owns a video game console then buy him some games. But most importantly you can get him a game membership of some sort. For example, Best Buy has something called Gamers Club Unlocked. During the holidays its about 30.00, any other time it can be well over 100.00 but it’s extremely useful. When they buy games at Best Buy they will receive discounts during the transaction and when they trade in games at Best Buy, they will receive 10% above the trade in value. All this on top of all the online perks they will get as well. Im sure you can find a membership like this at Game Stop and other gaming retailers. Or if your just balling, no budget, you can just get him a new game console. They even sell the game console bundles that come with a game. 

3.  Following a current trend, the Beats by Dre headphones are extremely popular. This is one gift that can easily break the bank so I would definitely do your research on Amazon and other online retailers. They can range from 150.00-400.00. But they tend to be worth it, very high quality headphones, and a very good gift if your man loves to listen to music on the go. 

4. Sporting tickets! If he has a favorite local team, buy him two tickets to a game. If it’s a football game, you can put together a cute tailgating basket for him as well. If he’s into basketball, then tickets to a Harlem Globetrotter show would be entertaining for the both of you. They go on tour all the time, so just check out their tour locations and dates. 

5. If your boyfriend loves movies like mine does, buy him an obscene amount of movies that will keep him occupied until at least Valentines day lol. Retailers like Best Buy and Target will sometimes do bundle deals when you buy multiple DVD’s at a time. You can create a cute little basket with popcorn, his favorite candy, maybe even a gift card to his favorite pizza place; everything that's essential for the perfect movie night!  

3 Good Reasons: To Get You A Hair Weave!

This post might be a little unorthodox but I feel it’s completely necessary. In the era of natural hair, wearing a weave is starting to be looked down on when it shouldn’t be. If you have never had a good hair weave, then you absolutely cannot part your weave-virgin lips, thinking you’re hair is better or even healthier then us girls who know better. & if you have embraced the popular go too look, then you will agree with everything I’m about to say. 

1. If installed correctly, your hair will grow. Personally, I only wear weave when I feel like I’m just doing too much to my hair. I’m a girl, I get bored, & my hair is usually the first thing I attack. (How I even ended up going natural: boredom.) If your hair stylist is an actual hair stylist or your homegirl actually knows what she’s doing, then they should be able to give you a sew-in that doesn’t put tension or stress on your hair. The results of a good sew-in are AMAZING. Think about it: naturalistas don’t shampoo often in fear that shampoo will strip the natural oils of the hair. Completely leaving your hair alone for 2-3 months (maybe longer) at a time, gives your hair time to completely absorb its own oils. In the end when you’re ready to take the braids down, you can see, feel, and smell the oil built up and you’ll see and feel that your hair isn’t dry. [Side note: this is time when you need to use shampoo lol] The fact that your hair wasn’t put under much environmental or everyday stress from styling tools & products is what helps maintain steady hair growth. 
2. Hair weaves are very low maintenance compared to your own hair. We’ve all been there: Its 7:30am and you’re running late for your 8am and you just stare in the mirror at your hair. It needs to be washed, detangled, and moisturized but that could take hours. If you properly care for your hair weave then the prep time in the morning takes minutes! You can wrap your hair at night, wake up and just brush. Or you can still rock your messy bun w/o it being truly messy. The versatility in a hair weave is amazing. African American natural hair can be hard to bounce between styles without washing, blow-drying, twisting, ect. But a hair weave is 10x easier. I can go from straight, to curly, to an up-do, back to bone straight without putting much product in my hair which in turn saves me a lot of time. I no longer have to wash out gel to get my hair to do what I want it too. 
3. Experimenting is the funniest part about weave. You’ve been dying to try the ombre trend but don’t want to damage your hair? Get yourself a weave and ombre the ends. Or maybe you’ve been getting a little inspiration from our beloved badgalri and want to go red? Dye your weave. The sky is the limit for what you can do to your hair weave in terms of hair color and cut. You want bangs? go for it! You can do it all, without actually doing anything.

If anyone needs any information on where to get good quality hair from, feel free to contact me. 

B. 

My Blessing

I feel like this is a blessing. 

Like God said "Brook stop guessing, 
stop stressing 
because in his arms, 
you'll be forever resting."

He's telling me that no matter what happened in the past, 

& no matter what happens in the future, 
that our love was meant to last. 

Our love is so unconditional 

But nothing about us is traditional. 

We do things our way, 
which is Gods way 
and because of that, 
I could never make this go away. 

You told me this was a blessing in disguise, 

So for this I will continue to praise high. 

My boyfriend is by far, my favorite blessing. 

B.

Other Half

Finding someone who accepts you flaws and all doesn’t come around often. 

You take me as I am and for that I am continuously falling .. 

for you. 

with you. 

behind you. 

ahead of you. 

I am all about you because our love is equivalent too .. 

the sun. 

the moon. 

the sea. 

the grass. 

you are my everything 

you make me wanna sing because you proved to be more than a fling. 

You proved to be my best friend. 

my partner. 

my clyde. 

my ace. 

You proved to be my man, someone who is always there pushing me telling me that I can

Your smile can brighten any mood. 

When I’m stressed. 

upset. 

pissed. 

irritated.

your smile is my favorite interlude. 

In a sensible way, I’m obsessed: infatuated with everything that is you

Everything that is your smile.

your touch.

your laugh.

Your hustle screams ambition, When you start, you push to finish like it has been your life mission. 

being your girl, means I’m practicing to be your wife

I love you because I need my other half forever in my life..

B.

Honeymoon

Why do I always feel like I’m wasting my time and energy in this 

maybe it’s because most of the time we can never seem to coexist. 

argument after argument, fight after fight, 

the more we go on the harder it is to see the light 

I try to be patient with you

I try to see things from your view 

but the more I do, the more I don’t want too

maybe I’m being selfish, maybe I’m being simple minded

but I feel like this love no longer has me blinded

no longer do I see us together forever holding hands

no longer do I see us being able to withstand 

I love you more then I thought capable

But the more we go on the more our bond is no longer unbreakable 

I don’t want to give up on you 

I just want to go back to the honeymoon

Back when your love was all I needed 

Not you constantly making me feel defeated. 

This was never us,

but lately love just doesn’t seem to be enough. 

B. 

Happy Place

Lately I just haven't been feeling like myself 

& now it seems like it's taking a toll on my health 

All I do is eat & sleep 

I get so depressed that I can't even balance on two feet. 

I pray that it's all in my head

That one of these days I'll bounce back & get tf up out of bed 

But my bed is my happy place 

When I'm sleep, nothing matters 

Because it's just me in my space 

I don't have to worry about the insecurities that reality will bring 

....To be honest all I really need is my bed & a drink. 

When I'm on that feel good 

Baby the world is like it should & I'm no longer misunderstood. 

Some people call it dependent

But I call it an instant ... 

But everyday I wake up to find that much hasn't changed from the night before 

So I just go back to bed saying maybe just a couple hours more. 

B.

Sunshine

I've always got sunshine on a cloudy day 

Because day in & day out, I can trust you, I know you would never betray.

Being in your arms is such an indescribable feeling

& after everything I've been through, your kiss is like emotional healing. 

In such a short time you've become my bestfriend, 

& I'm beyond blessed to be able to also call you my boyfriend. 

You do more for me then these lames EVER did.

& You're the reason why with him, god kept telling me to call it quits. 

There are times when I can be a straight bitch to you, 

& times when I'll say anything to argue; 

But you never sweat the little things

You’re ready for whatever, no matter what dramatics I may bring.

Everyday you prove your loyalty by the little things you do

& I love when it’s just us two, it’s like were our own little crew. 

It’s like gravity can take us wherever, as long as we remain together. 

And I know as long as we’re together, 

I'll never have to worry about the cold weather

Because I've always got sunshine on a cloudy day, 

& everybody knows who makes me feel this way 

B. 

2/14

Valentines day is not a made up holiday that men should shy away from. It’s a day that should be used to make your significant other feel as special as possible. The people that say everyday should be valentines day obviously don’t go through the everyday trials and tribulations just to get to the next day. This is one day out of every year that is designated to make her smile. To make her feel on top of the world. To make her feel like no other girl in the world matters. Some girls are simple, they just want to be noticed on Valentines day. Boys who say they “don’t celebrate Valentines day” are selfish. They let their girl see how much other men go all out to make their girl smile. And if she acts like she doesn’t care, she’s lying. No girl wants to watch her best friend's man go above and beyond for them while she sits there with nothing. And before y’all jump on my back, it’s never about the material things. It’s about being noticed and cared about. Men are too wrapped up in the stuff that they shouldn’t have to do for their girl. It’s not about you; this day is never about you. For one day, make it about her. 

I target this at men because most women, will always do for her man, even if he doesn't do for her. 

B. 

Nothing But Air

I can't explain you & I 

I watch you when you sleep 

But I feel nothing

It's an emptiness I can't really begin to try to describe. 

When you hold me, I don't get the butterflies that should be taking over my stomach.  

I get hot with annoyance, aggravation, & irritation. 

There was a time when all I longed for was you but since things have changed. 

Because even though you're the only man in my life, the only man who consumes my mind, 

I still don't feel a thing. 

I don't even feel like we can overcome the trails & tribulations that a relationship brings. 

There are even some nights that I wish I was laying elsewhere. 

I want to love you, I want to feel you
but when I kiss you .. 

I don't feel nothing but air. 

B. 

Footprints

When I think about you, nothing makes sense

& when I’m around you, I try to control myself but I never have the strength. 

I want you every minute of everyday 

but there’s nothing I can do to make you stay

see I want you to myself and nobody else 

but you’re the type to be surrounded by an entourage of females

usually thats not my type 

but at night, you’re the only one who holds me just right

the only one who makes me feel on top of the world 

who makes me wanna keep my lashes and my hair curled 

you touch me and my heart spins

Sometimes I wish these feelings for you didn’t begin 

but in my dreams, on my heart you left footprints

& hand and hand it was just me & my prince 

Wrote this awhile ago .. Just felt like posting something.

B. 

Love

Love is patient, love is kind

Like the way you accept my flaws & respect my grind 

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud

You love me as I am & you’re never afraid to say it out loud 

It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs 

You know just how to handle me, nothing with us is ever prolonged 

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth 

I understood your loyalty the moment we were introduced 

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves 

I never have to question your love and that is beyond dope 

Love never fails 

I promise our love will always prevail. 

B. 

They Don't Know

They don’t know about you and I 

we have this connection thats hard to even deny

& when you put it on me, boy you make me want to touch the sky 

when i first met you I was shy 

i didn’t want to come off as easy 

but baby you had me feeling queasy 

and as the butterflies were flying ..

I was out here lying .. 

I didn’t want them to know the truth 

The emotion between us, they had no proof 

They don’t know 

They don’t know that behind closed doors our love already started to grow 

Your girl and my man, they have no clue 

Our love holds ties that they can’t possibly undo 

I used to want you on some selfish shit 

But this thing we have turns me on, I have to admit 

As long as we keep this between me & you

nobody will have a clue. 

B. 

Situations

when things happens for reasons unseen you become lost 

we’re sliding  

you start to wonder if you did something to deserve these ungodly consequences 

we’re spinning 

you question every wrong you’ve ever done

we’re screaming 

you get down on your knees and pray until they bleed

we’re clenching 

you thank God that you’re alive

we hit

you then ask God to keep you safe from harms way 

we’re holding 

you know these things could happen to anybody

we’re crying

but you still wonder why it was your life that was almost taken 

we’re .. okay. 

B.